When people understand that hell is the natural consequence of the attempted marriage between perfectly sinful people and a perfectly just God, they are better equipped to deal with the issue at the time of death.

The cold of the night air is only matched by the cold chill that embraced me as I walked into the hospital room. A family, none of which have personal relationships with Jesus, are trying to deal with the loss of their aging parent, and he just lies there in the bed. I comfort the family and then stand in long pauses of silence as we watch him die. Death is robbery insomuch as decay is the theft of a physical presence. Full features become a hollow face and strong muscles atrophy, as the mortal clothes of a man are slowly stripped from him. And I realize that that is why I am here. I am to join hands with this family and cover the nakedness of death. So we weep, we pray, we eulogize all in an attempt to put emotional patches over the torn fragments of this loved flesh. However, what do we do as believers when the deceased did not believe? How do we handle this delicate tragedy? In a previous article, we said that we could not be dishonest. Compassionate dishonesty is still dishonest for by our words we may inadvertently tell people that all people go to heaven.

A cultural universalism has been birthed in the silence and cowardice of Christians at the time of death, as we rationalize lying in an effort to be compassionate. What can be done to help people in the church deal with death? Simply, we must infuse our people with a passion for the truth, and compassion for people. Specifically, we must be honest about the power of heaven and the reality of hell.

Heaven is reserved for those who have thrown themselves at the mercy of God. According to Jesus, He has "…prepared a place for you…that where I am you may be also"(John 14:2,3). In dealing with heaven, Jesus deals with it's greatest quality: His presence. You see the language of John 14 is marriage language, as a Jewish boy would build a house onto his father's home to prepare for his bride. According to the Old Testament, the boy was to stay with his bride and not go to war for one year. When we teach this passage, it helps to emphasize the fact that only the bride goes with the groom on the honeymoon. We are the bride of Christ, and heaven is an eternal honeymoon with the Lover of my soul! He fills all that I need forever in a perpetually increasing fulfillment! By painting a picture of the glories of heaven, people grasp the reality that Jesus taught in the same passage when He said, "…no one comes to the Father but by me" (v.6). It is only the bride who goes.

This exclusiveness speaks to the horrid reality that waits for the unbeliever as well. I am thoroughly convinced that we do not preach on hell enough. Our silence has opened the door for pluralism, as teaching on hell has been relegated for "mature" believers and our theology of hell has become suspect because it is seen as irrelevant. When people understand that hell is the natural consequence of the attempted marriage of sinful people and a perfectly just God, they are better equipped to deal with the issue at the time of death.

The man, who I was called to see, dies. Of course I do not know, but I am suspect that this man I had met he never had a personal relationship with Christ. So, what do I do? Well, I must be honest. For the reality is that while I am preaching the funeral, it is possible that he is in eternal torment. If this is true, imagine the stark irony. According to Jesus' words in Luke 16, hell is a place of clear memory, vivid recollection, and strange compassion. In the story Jesus told, we have a man in hell that is pleading for the life of his family still on earth. So can you see the stark reality of what happens at many funerals? A person in hell is writhing in torment, screams coming from the core of who they are, while their loved ones on earth softly sing Amazing Grace. It is a strange alchemy of the bliss of ignorance and the kiss of death.

Therefore, I spent the entire funeral service telling people about the Gospel. How inappropriate you say, how insensitive, how untraditional it was. However, here is why I was so bold: I will die. And, as a believer, I will be accountable to God as to how I have handled the opportunities entrusted to my care. My best understanding of the judgment of the believer (Matthew 14:25-30, and II Corinthians 5:10 etc.) leads me to understand that while God will not punish my sins, He will see me as a steward entrusted with a charge, and reward me accordingly. Why must we be so brutally honest? Because my fear is not that I will die before I wake, but that I would die before others live. I am afraid that it is not compassion that drives eulogy dishonesty, it is cowardice. For we are all dying; some too eternal life, some to eternal death. Honesty about heaven and hell must be in the pulpit, the pew, and the cemetery.

Oh Lord, teach us to love the dying, whether they are in beds, classrooms, or cubicles. Let us live with the compassionate honesty of Christ, that we my die with the knowledge we have held His truth in love.